What happens when you lose the ability to control your will? At some point, you come to a place where it is impossible to change it. Something has been locked in. That is the warning I want you to get out of this message. The decisions you make today are extremely important because they form your will and that solidifies as it matures, until it becomes unchangeable (Proverbs 22:6).
It is not good enough to control your actions. You must come willingly to the Father and will to do His will, just as Yeshua (Jesus) did when He prayed, “Not My will, but Yours be done” (Luke 22:42).1 To do that, your will must be disciplined to do His will. Let me give you some scriptural examples. During the time of Yeshua’s trials and crucifixion, Peter failed miserably; he denied the Lord. He was literally cursing at people, saying, “I do not know the man!” When he heard the cock crow and looked at Yeshua, he realized what he had done and went out and wept bitterly (Matthew 26:69-75). Peter repented. He understood what he had done, corrected his will through repentance, and went on to become an apostle.
On that same night, Judas also recognized what he had done; he had betrayed innocent blood.
He felt remorse and returned the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders, saying, “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood.” But they said, “What is that to us? See to that yourself!” And he threw the pieces of silver into the temple sanctuary and departed; and he went away and hanged himself. (Matthew 27:3-5)
Unlike Peter, Judas could not find a place of repentance. Judas had reached a place where, even when he recognized what he had done, he could not do what he needed to do because his will was set in another direction. The story of Esau is another illustration of this.
That there be no immoral or godless person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a single meal. For you know that even afterwards, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no place for repentance, though he sought for it with tears. (Hebrews 12:16-17)
What is an immoral or godless person like Esau? Someone who can no longer will the will of God. Even though Esau recognized what he needed to do and sought repentance, he was unable to repent. He had come to the point in his life where his will could no longer will the things of God. That is also what happened to Judas. Time after time, decision after decision, satan kept entering Judas’s heart. He did not suddenly decide one night to betray Christ (John 13:2, 25-27). Day after day, week after week, month after month, his will was being formed to follow that path until he willed the will of satan (John 12:4-6). Once Judas realized what he was doing, he was no longer able to change it. His will was no longer malleable to the point that it could be changed. It was not that God rejected Esau or Judas. God rejected their wills that were set against Him. God gave us the gift of a free will and we are the ones responsible for it. Fix your will on Him (Psalm 57:7). You can control it.
1 All Scripture references are from the New American Standard Bible 1995 (NASB1995).